It’s amazing what a game of football can do for your perspective.
I was sitting in a Pizza Hut watching the Packers vs. Falcons game, waiting for a big, cheesy pie with peppers and mushrooms to come out. The city is all lit up and people are hollering for their favorite teams. Suddenly I’m feeling more like my normal, city-girl self.
If you’ve known me at all in the past few months, you know I’ve been unsettled with where I’m living. To better explain it, it’s like I’m starring in my own cartoon. I’m driving down an interstate, in my red convertible with the top down. The sun is shining and I am singing to upbeat music blasting on the radio. When I look to my left and to my right, I notice large, red signs that say “Wrong Way”. Each one of them says the same thing and they stand half a mile apart. I have some great company, beautiful scenery, and a very cute outfit but, I’m still headed in the wrong direction.
You see, I want to like Colorado Springs. I have a fun job with really great people. I have a warm home and a car to take me anywhere. My life is essentially good. But I feel like I’m headed down the wrong way on a one way street, and sometimes with sunglasses on.
I’ve been missing a small town, close family, and quiet streets. I’ve been wondering why I’m longing for a place that I tried so hard to escape. Truthfully, I think it’s all about familiarity. Familiarity is comforting to us. We like the atmospheres and places and people that know us, understand us, and accept us. In the midst of all my changing and my ‘un’-comfort, I’m missing familiarity. I could use more familiarity in the chaos.
And while I love the feeling of warm summer nights watching softball, just blocks away from my house, and chili cook-offs that bring an entire community together, I have to remember what’s ahead. I will always love my hometown and the memories I have there. I will always love a simple life and simple pleasures. But tonight, I’m feeling more like myself. The girl who loves her cities, and the girl who loves trying new things, loves finding new places, and who isn’t afraid of making new memories. I miss the familiar, but I know I am meant for more.
I will always have the small town and home to return to. And I will always have my family very near to me, no matter where we are. But there is something about a packed stadium, big bright lights, and a pass so beautiful you could tattoo it on your arm that reminds you how much fun there is still to be had.