i wish

I wish You would speak, I wish I could hear You.

A woman's intuition is a well-known, often discussed topic. The way she knows to nurture, the way she knows to have and raise children, the way she understands emotions without a word being spoken. Most people attribute this to the genetics of a woman. Most people think women have intuition like men have facial hair. But I credit it to God. In some divine, supernatural form, I think intuition is a way of God speaking to someone without doing it loudly. In fact, I'm betting some men have this quality too, but you never hear about a man’s intuition...

And I've had my fair share of intuition--sometimes in dreams, sometimes in thoughts. I've even had experiences that could classify as "just knowing" or "hearing from God". I've called someone to say, "I thought about this today" and they responded with, "that's exactly what happened". I've had weird feelings in a crowded room or suspicions about a workplace, and I'm growing to understand that I can trust those thoughts, those feelings, because oftentimes they are keeping me alert and ready for the truth behind the curtain.

Intuition is defined as the ability to acquire knowledge without inference or the use of reason. And, frankly, I've learned that I can live completely and fully without reason. A lot of the times, the decisions I've made to follow God are completely and fully without reason. His direction no longer has to make sense to me.

And sure, maybe it's the counselor and psychologist in me that senses things going on behind the scenes. Maybe it's the part of me that knows that healing starts on the inside. Maybe it's the God-given gifts to reach for people's hearts that makes me think I can hear a deeper, inner voice.

Either way, today I wish You would speak. I wish You could just come into that bush across the parking lot, sit in the seat beside me, have lunch with me, or ride in the passenger seat of my car and just speak. I wish I wasn't relying on my own ability to decipher between intuition and mental institution. I wish I wasn't on my own to know if it's me that I hear or You that I hear.

I wish You would speak, I wish I could hear You.